Since even before I knew I wanted children I knew that I'd want to breastfeed if children were to be. I knew that some people struggle with it - but that wouldn't be me.
That was me. That was us. We struggled. I'm sure her jaundice and my lack of experience didn't help. When we landed back in the hospital we were on a strict routine of attempting to breast feed followed by giving Victoria any expressed breast milk topping her up with formula and then pumping. This process took me well over an hour and she was only going 3 hours from the start of one feeding to the start of the next.
From our combined lack of knowledge breastfeeding I was only able to pump 12mL. Twelve. This was beyond frustrating, disappointing and gave me feelings of being a failure at being a mom. Some of this was likely due to the giant hormone change going on in me and some because this was suppose to be natural and how your body worked and mine wasn't working. I also had feelings of envy as the other NICU moms were pumping up a storm, 4+oz at a time! I saw a doctor and got a prescription for domperidone. Kept up the program of breast, expressed, formula and pumping. Slowly, very slowly production increased. I'm talking 3mL a week at the start.
By Christmas, Victoria was almost 4 weeks old and I dropped trying to get her to feed at the breast from the routine. This was partially because she pretty much immediately fell asleep but mainly due to the pain in my nipples from the pumping and breastfeeding every 3 hours and my lack of sleep. I discussed this with my lactation consultant who assured me that we could still have success breastfeeding if I wanted to try again in a few weeks. So I gave my nipples a break. By the end of January I was pretty much producing enough milk that we rarely needed any formula top ups. There are no words to describe how this made me feel. There was just one more step in our process - get Victoria to drink from the breast and not the bottle.
This transition went way smoother than I was expecting! Her being 2 months bigger and stronger she took to the breast like a natural...in a little over a week we were transitioned. The only bottles she gets are if I'm not with her and a 2oz formula top off at night to help her sleep a bit longer.
I've gone from 12mL in a hospital grade pump (that's total of both breasts combined) to waking up two days ago in a puddle of milk (also have 15mL in the freezer!!). There were many times I wanted to quit but thankfully I had many people in my corner supporting whatever decision I made.
That was me. That was us. We struggled. I'm sure her jaundice and my lack of experience didn't help. When we landed back in the hospital we were on a strict routine of attempting to breast feed followed by giving Victoria any expressed breast milk topping her up with formula and then pumping. This process took me well over an hour and she was only going 3 hours from the start of one feeding to the start of the next.
From our combined lack of knowledge breastfeeding I was only able to pump 12mL. Twelve. This was beyond frustrating, disappointing and gave me feelings of being a failure at being a mom. Some of this was likely due to the giant hormone change going on in me and some because this was suppose to be natural and how your body worked and mine wasn't working. I also had feelings of envy as the other NICU moms were pumping up a storm, 4+oz at a time! I saw a doctor and got a prescription for domperidone. Kept up the program of breast, expressed, formula and pumping. Slowly, very slowly production increased. I'm talking 3mL a week at the start.
By Christmas, Victoria was almost 4 weeks old and I dropped trying to get her to feed at the breast from the routine. This was partially because she pretty much immediately fell asleep but mainly due to the pain in my nipples from the pumping and breastfeeding every 3 hours and my lack of sleep. I discussed this with my lactation consultant who assured me that we could still have success breastfeeding if I wanted to try again in a few weeks. So I gave my nipples a break. By the end of January I was pretty much producing enough milk that we rarely needed any formula top ups. There are no words to describe how this made me feel. There was just one more step in our process - get Victoria to drink from the breast and not the bottle.
This transition went way smoother than I was expecting! Her being 2 months bigger and stronger she took to the breast like a natural...in a little over a week we were transitioned. The only bottles she gets are if I'm not with her and a 2oz formula top off at night to help her sleep a bit longer.
I've gone from 12mL in a hospital grade pump (that's total of both breasts combined) to waking up two days ago in a puddle of milk (also have 15mL in the freezer!!). There were many times I wanted to quit but thankfully I had many people in my corner supporting whatever decision I made.